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 janice chian the glamorously unglamorous girl you see standing there playing with her fingernails and guilty of trying not to shake her feet. just another girl next door who might bite when needed to. also that girl you might ♥ to death, or follow me.
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13.7.08
title: oh, bring back my lucky to me. time: 1:37 AM --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  Lucky Rainbow. (on the right) please come back. please? please come back alive and well. come back so that i can treat you better and the way you deserved all along. * while i was out having fun in singapore. history repeated itself and its torturing me all over again. anyone remember silver? remember that sweet lil puppy i had and left, for good? lucky is now gone too. some f'in car ran over her. * my parents couldn't find it's body. delusionally, and hopefully... it is alive somewhere. and hopefully, it will come back again. at my doorstep.. the way she always did in the past. golden, my bigger dog... is already waiting by the door for her. thinking about it only makes me cry all over again. * i was always a lil bias with lucky. always pat golden a lil more than lucky. complained a lil more when lucky licked me when i didnt want her to. i feel like a horrible person now. she was such a good dog. like, perfect. she was the sweetheart that always knew how to shun cars when it came in the house porch, why didn't it this time. why didn't it see the car coming? * i had never want history to repeat itself. never to have to feel the pain of losing my doggy this way again. everytime they ran out of the house... and if i saw a car coming towards them when they are crossing the road. i'd dash out, run to the middle of the road and block the car with my arms wide opened or wave it to stop. why wasn't i there to do it this time. i could have stopped it from happening. * praying so hard that it will be okay and come home. though everyone who was there at that point is telling me that its impossible to be alive. for now, lying to myself is the only way out. * i had wanted to shower lucky and golden with more love and care. bring them for walks and give them all the hugs and pats they deserve. i've been procrastinating since last week and just yesterday i was set on doing it prolly starting tomorrow. but its too late now. too late. * just like in real life... we procrastinate to tell people how we really feel, care and to forgive or apologise. but we forget how we can be totally underestimating the time we have. before you know it, it can never be said or done anymore. * ='( * *** bryan's sweet self made wishes after i told him what happened thanks bryan. =) days of our life, we head where we wanna be times in our life, we turn around to see what we left behind often in life, we were left behind always in life, we will and must move on To those who left us, we wish them all the best to com While those who are still with us, we wish them all the best to come * and yes, i'm hoping what chris says is true. all dogs go to heaven. * *** * amanda's birthday was great. but i've no mood to blog about it now. pics are here though. x |